There was no other time in my life that I can recall to date where I felt more vulnerable and afraid than in the fall of 2016. I’ve always been a pretty tough cookie when it comes to most things in life, never letting much prevent me from what I was focused on accomplishing. But this was different. Now I was facing a deep-seeded fear…one that has been rooted in me since I was a little girl; a fear that, if I let it, could have very well stood in the way between where I was and what I wanted most in life.
I was in the midst of going through IVF (in-vitro fertilization); all the exams, poking and prodding, needles and blood work – everything that I had always done my best to stay away from at all cost throughout my life. I’m the girl who used to faint at school during vaccinations; the woman would bawl her eyes out in an overly dramatic display at any suggestion of blood work (just ask the ladies at the Emergency Room). At this point though, I had two choices when it came to fear: forget everything and run, or face everything and rise. I was torn.
It was during this time that I was reading the biggest book I’ve ever read, and to this day I’m still surprised I got through the nearly 500 pages of ”Awaken the Giant Within” by Tony Robbins. Dating back to 1991, this book is full of valuable ideas that stand the test of time, and that completely changed my perspective on the fear I was facing. I remember reading one of the chapters a day or two before I had to get some invasive procedures done, and feeling like I was invincible and could do anything I put my mind to – including facing this fear of mine.
The book spoke about changing your belief system when it comes to your fears and being empowered by the decisions you’re making. So often we trick our mind into believing that something will cause us pain as a mechanism to prevent us from being hurt, and we let this fear hold us back from achieving the end result of that which we really want. The book reiterated that we must focus on what we want in life, instead of the obstacles, such as fear, that you might have to overcome to get there.
By changing my perspective and facing my fear head on, it led to one of the most amazing things I have ever experienced – being a mom to my son.
The experiences we have in life are meant to make us strong, help us grow and to challenge us to rise above. Everything happens at exactly the right time to teach us the lessons we need to learn to help us navigate through life. Whenever you’re faced with a fear or obstacle that is seemingly preventing you from getting to where you want to go, change your perspective and ask yourself what the opportunity is. Take it from me – it’s hard to see it that way sometimes when you’re in the middle of the storm, but when you get to the other side you’ll realize there was a reason you had to experience that situation, and that it added value to your life in the grand scheme of things.
“Focus on where you want to go, not on what you fear.” ~Tony Robbins~